“I don’t know how much longer I can keep going without a friend. I used to be able to do it very easily, but that was before I knew what having a friend was like. It’s much easier not to know things sometimes. And to have french fries with your mom be enough.”—The Perks Of Being A Wallflower, Stephen Chbosky (via emjaydavies)
“You know that moment that comes when the last tear falls? The one when you realize that your worst fears have come to light and you’re still breathing? Never forget the moment you look into the mirror and into your red eyes and see that you aren’t broken or weak or lost at all. You are thin skin over steel.”—unknown (via middlenameconfused)
This is what has happened. Something that I can’t say happened because I’m too afraid that it could be something. That I would have to admit something that I can’t say. You see, there is this someone who did this something and seemed to something his something. And it’s scary because his something is just so breakable. I suppose that’s why I can’t say something. It’s just that something is wrong, for today at least, maybe not tomorrow. But for today there is something that I can’t say.
“It seems to me that almost all our sadnesses are moments of tension, which we feel as paralysis because we no longer hear our astonished emotions living. Because we are alone with the unfamiliar presence that has entered us; because everything we trust and are used to is for a moment taken away from us; because we stand in the midst of a transition where we cannot remain standing. That is why the sadness passes: the new presence inside us, the presence that has been added, has entered our heart, has gone into its innermost chamber and is no longer even there, - is already in our bloodstream. And we don’t know what it was. We could easily be made to believe that nothing happened, and yet we have changed, as a house that a guest has entered changes. We can’t say who has come, perhaps we will never know, but many signs indicate that the future enters us in this way in order to be transformed in us, long before it happens. And that is why it is so important to be solitary and attentive when one is sad: because the seemingly uneventful and motionless moment when our future steps into us is so much closer to life than that other loud and accidental point of time when it happens to us as if from outside. The quieter we are, the more patient and open we are in our sadnesses, the more deeply and serenely the new presence can enter us, and the more we can make it our own, the more it becomes our fate.”—Rainer Maria Rilke (via black-wolves)
“At the end of the day, i don’t owe the world a thin body in exchange for their acknowledgment and approval, i’m not magically a better and more worthy person because my pants size is smaller. If someone’s gonna make a continuance for love and acceptance based on my weight then they belong with all the toxic sludge, in the trash.”—Laci Green (via creatingaquietmind)
“We have to learn the art of stopping- stopping our thinking, our habit energies, our forgetfulness, the strong emotions that rule us. When an emotion rushes through us like a storm, we have no peace.”—“The Heart of Buddha’s Teaching” - Thich Bharat Hanh (via theearthsheartbeat)
“I’ve always wanted to not give a fuck. While crying helplessly into my pillow for no good reason, I would often fantasize that maybe someday I could be one of those stoic badasses whose emotions are mostly comprised of rock music and not being afraid of things.”—Allie Brosh (via 17felines)
“In ancient times, people weren’t just male or female, but one of three types: male/male, male/female, or female/female. In other words, each person was made out of the components of two people. Everyone was happy with this arrangement and never really gave it much thought. But then God took a knife and cut everybody in half, right down the middle. So after that the world was divided into male and female, the upshot being that people spend their time running around trying to locate their missing other half.”—Kafka on the Shore, Haruki Murakami (via 17felines)
“When things break, it’s not the actual breaking that prevents them from getting back together again. it’s because a little piece gets lost — the two remaining ends couldn’t fit together even if they wanted to. the whole shape has changed.”—David Levithan, Will Grayson, Will Grayson (via selfinspiration)
I think I’m ugly sometimes. I tan easily. I have a bad memory. I wish my hair was a different color. I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color. I have/had braces. I wear glasses. I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe,free of cost, and scar-free.
I’ve been told I’m attractive by a complete stranger.
I have more than 2 piercings. I have piercing in places besides my ears. I have freckles. I’ve been kicked out of the house. I have a sibling less than six year old. I want to have kids someday. I’m in school. I have a job. I’ve fallen asleep at work/school. I almost always do/did my homework. I drift off a lot. I have big dreams. I’ve missed a week or more of school. I failed more than 1 class last year. I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation. Disney movies still make me cry. I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried. I think of stupid things to do. I was born with a disease/impairment. I’ve gotten stitches/staples. I’ve broken a bone.
I’ve had my tonsils removed.
I’ve sat in a emergency room with a friend. I’ve gotten a ride with someone I don’t know. I’ve been on a plane. I’ve wished on a shooting star.
I’ve seen a meteor shower. I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas. I’ve been to a casino. I’ve been skydiving. I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
I’ve gone skinny dipping. I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour. I’ve had dry rum shots. I’ve been skiing. I’ve been in a play. I’ve caught a snowflake on my tongue. I’ve seen the Northern lights. I’ve sat on a roof top at night. I’ve played chicken fight. I’ve played a prank on someone. I’ve ridden in a taxi. People have only liked me cause of my looks. I’ve been used sometimes. I’ve gone on a blind date. I’ve used someone else.
I’ve broken someone’s heart. I miss someone right now. I know someone who has committed suicide… I have a fear of abandonment. I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t. I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did. I’ve had a crush on a teacher. I am a cuddler. I’ve kissed a boy. I’ve kissed a girl. I ’ve kissed more than one girl. I’ve been kissed in the rain. I’ve hugged a stranger. I have kissed a stranger. I’ve been called a slut. I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t. I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t. I’ve snuck out of my house. I am keeping a secret from the world. I’ve cheated on a test. I’ve been suspended from school. I’ve witnessed a crime.
I’ve had people who wanted to bash me.
I’ve been arrested.
I’ve helped a friend who has passed out from alcohol. I regularly smoke cigarettes. I’ve tried smoking cigarettes. I’ve taken painkillers when I didn’t need them. I’ve eaten shrooms. I’ve popped E. I’ve inhaled Nitrous. I’ve done hard drugs. I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem. I have at one stage in my life been diagnosed with depression. I have been diagnosed with one or more anxiety disorder. I shut others out when I’m depressed. I take anti-depressants. I’ve slept an entire day when I didn’t need it. I’ve hurt myself on purpose.
I’ve woken up crying. I’m afraid of dying. I hate funerals. I miss someone who I know isn’t coming back. I’ve seen someone dying. Someone close to me has committed suicide… I’ve planned my own suicide. I’ve attempted suicide. I’ve written a eulogy for myself. I own an iPod or MP3 player. I regret some things I’ve done in my lifetime.